Wednesday, November 2, 2011

*Blink* We're Adults!

There are very few disadvantages I have found to getting married at a young(ish) age, but there is one that nags at me again and again.

Getting married sort of shoves you into adulthood whether you wanted it or not.  I spent over 3 years of my life getting to know my beloved before we tied the proverbial knot, and I maintain that we were totally ready for marriage.  But as soon as we got back from the honeymoon, it was like a switch had been flipped in our minds and our lives.

We were ready, man.  We were ready to own furniture and live on our own together and get real jobs and take exotic vacations and buy fancy cars and a fancy house.  For one whole month, I let this mindset completely take over.

Us newlyweds over here had very little to call our own, and of course what we did own wasn’t good enough (we’re adults, remember?), so it got tossed.  Time to start fresh!  We moved across the country, bought all new furniture and appliances, ate out every day for the first week, and sighed with happiness as we climbed onto our (new!) mattress laid perfectly on our (new!) bed under warm (new!) sheets.

Then reality struck.  I had a minor meltdown (which sir husband man is used to thankfully) and sat down with him for a Talk with a capital T.  Since then, we have had to seriously re-evaluate our preconceived notions of what marriage and adulthood looks like.

I know married couples aren’t the only ones who experience this, but I really do think we get hit a little harder.  People start asking about babies and homes and want to talk about mortgages and bills.  Our whole lives we get fed this sneaky little lie that we deserve better, and we’ll get it at some magical point.  For me that point was marriage.  

So I’m putting it all down in writing, so the whole blog world can hold me accountable!  Yes, someday we would love to have a house.  But when I really think about it, I don’t even want that responsibility right now.  Yes, some far-off day we will probably want to have kids, but the thought of them right now makes me want to pass out.  A better car, of course!  A better job, definitely!

But I am vowing to be patient with these things, and be happy with where I am in life.  I absolutely L-O-V-E being married, and look forward to so many things we can share together in the future.  And in this month of Thanksgiving, I want to say I am so incredibly thankful for:

-My car that is 15 years old with no air conditioning and ripped seats and peeling ceiling that is PAID FOR.
-Our little apartment that could use a teensy bit of storage but it perfect for our budget and perfect for our things.
- All the new things we were able to buy that will (must!) last us a long, long time.
- My job that I’m not crazy about but which allows us to pay extra each month on our student loans.

What’s not to love in a little charm and a whole lot of hope for the future?

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